Flashback to Senior Year Before SBCC, Why SBCC, Struggling Songwriter, English Major

I was the female role/dancer in Percussive Theatre/Drumline

As a senior in highschool I was indecisive about my future. I applied to San Francisco State, CSU Channel Islands, and CSU Northridge. I wasn't going to apply to four year universities because I felt like my application didn't stand out as much as I would of liked to. Here was I a senior with a 4.33 GPA involved in programs in school (AVID, AP/Honors, and Drumline) and outside of school (Santa Barbara Teen News Network and Santa Barbara Youth Music Academy) thinking I needed something more. After I applied to those schools I started doubting myself so much that I ignored the all deadlines to further the application progress. 

On set with the Santa Barbara Teen News Network

My sister, a year older than me, was enrolled at Santa Barbara City College. Although, she was accepted by CSU Channel Islands, her dream school, she decided to attend SBCC. I told myself I would not follow into her footsteps... Until I started waiting for her classes to get out at City College. I didn't mind it because I would bring my guitar or go run at La Playa Stadium  while I waited  for her. I started thinking it wouldn't be so bad if I went here. The ocean was across the street, it was near downtown, and I could continue running at the track. I think the main reason I didn't feel confident about my college applications was because one, I wasn't sure if I wanted to major in Journalism, Songwriting,or Creative Writing and two, I wasn't ready to leave home. I couldn't leave this beautiful place, a city in which tourists come all over the country to explore. 

Capitol Records in Hollywood

I consider myself as a songwriter and back then I thought it would be easy to pursue this dream.  My plan was to move down to Los Angeles and personally hand producers my demos and have them listen to them assuming they would automatically be impress with my lyrics and hire me for their record labels. Unfortunately it doesn't work that way, I know this for a fact. I tried out for two singing competitions, thinking if I get in I could perform my own songs at the showcases. I never even got a callback. It wasn't until this recent singing competition that assured myself that I'm going to keep songwriting and auditioning, while still attending school. Some say that one can easily learn from being on the streets, but I love being in a classroom listening to professors lecture about different subject. Skipping a year to see if I could make it as a songwriter is an incredible risk and I applaud those who do it, but I think having an education is beneficial as well. If people in the music industry saw that I got a bachelors degree, they can think wow this girl is serious about her education, maybe she's as serious with her music. 

My Journal

I decided that since I enjoyed reading and writing so much, I could improve my writing and discover different forms of literature by becoming an English Major. Although I've been getting average grades on my writing pieces in Creative Writing, I'm leaning away from resisting to revise my work. I need revision, otherwise how else would I improve? I visited my Creative Writing professor during his office hours and he said that I shouldn't stay in the same nineteen year old writing perspective, I need to grow as a writer. I took it a bit farther by considering to become an English Professor. I can still be both a Professor and a Songwriter. 

My advice to you is don't doubt yourself and a fail is not necessarily a fail because you gain something from it. Motivation.  

-KIKI REYES